Back From the Dead

Oops, I was wrong. It's been since OCTOBER. Here I was thinking it had only been three months since I posted. Well, here is where we are: Lying liar who lies-ville. Population, one almost 4 year old.

Everything was going so well.

Even before their parents left, we were doing play doh this morning. It's cold as all get out here today so I figured I would just let them do whatever they wanted, instead of packing them in the car and making them go somewhere. They did play doh for TWO HOURS. It was amazing. Then I bought stuff to make rice krispy treats...PINK ones even. Went fabulously. We played for a bit, everyone was being kind to one another. Angels were singing. We went to the pet store and no one scared the shit out of the fish by knocking hello. What children are these? I made pizza for lunch while they quietly watched 101 Dalmations. I asked Rose what fruit she wanted and she chose apple. We sat down to eat and the girl who can chug a juice box in 20 seconds ignored hers for the very first time. I felt like I was in some alternate universe.

Then. It started. "I don't want the cheese on my pizza." Fine, take it off, but you're not getting a krispy treat. Ok. "I'm going to wait until Phillip takes his nap to eat my apples so he doesn't stop eating his lunch." You're nuts, the boy has eaten every single last bite of apple and had seconds on pizza. Dude's getting TWO krispy treats. "I want to take a nap now." (She hasn't napped in 2 weeks). Are you saying that to get out of eating your apple? "Yes." Cool, then go to time out. A few minutes later, I ask her what she needs to do "I'm sorry for lying about not eating my apples." Thanks, now if you don't want to eat them, just say so, don't (mumbling curse words behind my clenched teeth) lie about it. "Ok, I don't want to eat my apples." Ok, no krispy treat. "Boooo, wahhhhh." Have a good nap.

End scene.

Meanwhile, Phillip is chomping down on his krispy treat and happily acknowledging nap time steadily approaching. Finishes eating, gets carried upstairs, says goodnight. Bliss.

I go to sit down, enjoy a krispy treat and zone out. DING DONG DING DONG. Why....why do you have to ring it twice as I am getting to enjoy my only hour alone in two weeks? WHY!!!!!!!!!!! Oh, right. It's the counter top guy, 45 minutes early. What planet is this guy from? EARLY? Oh well. Here to measure the counter tops. Yes, yes I DO need the mountains of crap cleaned off of them. Grrreat. I'll get right on that.

I'm on my fourth krispy treat.